#97

I make little kids cry.

#96

You're HOT!


(Please note that this may not apply to you..)

#95

You can't make a person love you. You can only stalk them and hope for the best.

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#85

• The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

• Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.

• Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

• Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.

• The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.

• Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two".

• Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus' birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.

• If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

• When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anaesthesia was applied to the doctors.

• If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.

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